"I waited too long to read the sequel, and now I can’t even remember the characters."
A novel by me
So every morning I get off the train and start my 20 minute walk to work, and there’s this guy who’s always like 3 steps ahead of me and always beats me to the street corner bc I get stopped by the light and he passes it. but today I was ahead of him for the first time and he RUNS in front of me, turns around and goes “I’ve been winning for 2 months, can’t stop now, have a good day, see you tomorrow.” tmrw I swear i’m wearing running shoes to work.
A guy is taking his girlfriend to prom. He waits in the ticket line for a really long time but gets them. He goes to rent a limo. The rental line is really long but he eventually does it. He goes to buy her flowers. The line at the florist is really long but eventually he gets the flowers. At prom, she asks him to go get punch. He goes to the refreshment table and there’s no punchline.
you’ve got to be kidding me
real talk the first place id hit up during the purge is the pet store u gonna see me on the street with 50 puppies on leashes
a paranormal mockumentary show in the style of the office/parks and rec
revolving around the lives of employees at a hokey haunted mansion tourist trap that turn out to be actually hella haunted but most of its spirits are either benevolent or ineffectively malevolent
10/10 WOULD WATCH